Phone Lady: Can I please have your phone number?

J: Ma'am, I don't have a phone. That's why I'm calling you, from the cable company.

PL who, oddly enough, has a Jamaican accent: Well, surely you have a phone somewhere else. You're new to Yellowknife, right?

J: Yes, that's right. How about my work phone, back home?

PL: Perfect. So where's home, anyway?

J: Toronto.

PL: JEEEEESUS CHRIST, you poor unlucky bastard! You left Toronto?

J: ...yeah. There's worse places to go, though.

PL: Yeah, you could have been stuck in Tuk. Well, I know how that feels, I'm from Toronto too.

J: Oh really? Wow. So here's my number. [blah]

PL: OK, I got it. And where do you work? How long? What do you do?

J: I work at [blah], it's been 7 years. We make software.

PL: OK. And your boss's name? And phone number?

J: It's M. You can reach him at the same number, but a different extension.

PL: Can you give me that number again? It's on the last page, I'd have to go back to get it.

J: Sure, it's [blah].

PL: Great. You know how it is, Mr. Software Genius. This stupid system, you should really come fix this for us, I'm sure they'd hire you.

J: Yeah, I could do that. You just let them know for me.

PL: Haha. OK, so, because you're a software genius and you been working for the same place for 7 years and have a VISA and all o dat, we don't need a security deposit from you, even though you're just a chile'.

J: Terrific. Thanks very much.

PL: Now, I can rent you a phone, but you don't want to do that because our prices are no good. You just walk on down the street and visit the Wal Mart or the Radio Shack, they'll sell you a phone a hell of a lot cheaper, ok?

J: Yes ma'am, I'll do that, thanks.

PL: OK great, the phone will be working later today. Nobody gonna visit, we do it all from here. Ain't computers wonderful? But you know all that already, haha! You just give us a call if you need anything else. Take care now, byebye!